How to Make a Chocolate Pie

First, get a vague recipe from your brother.

Then...call your grandmother...

...and sister about 6 times to clarify said recipe.

On the 6th call, get a completely different recipe from your sister.

Make sure it includes something that you don't have in your pantry so that you can make an extra trip to the store.

Be sure to use all of the mixing bowls, measuring cups, spatulas, and spoons in your kitchen.

Don't be shy! Fill up your two trash cans to the brim.

Bake on 325 for 25 minutes. Check it every 10 seconds to make sure it's okay.

VERY important: get one handsome husband to do all the dishes.

While you gaze adoringly at your masterpiece!

Don't worry about saving the pie for the event you made it for--eat a piece* ahead of time...for quality control purposes, of course.

*Repeat as needed just to make real sure.